Hello?
Oh, hi there! How are you?
I’m alright, thanks for asking.
Well, I guess there’s one thing
that's been preying on my mind.
It’s nothing, really, and I may not
have my facts quite straight, but, well –
You know that hype about the ozone hole?
I heard it’s causing acid rain
in South America, did you?
Yeah, so all these oil giants
are deforestating all the trees
to combat overpopulation –
No, I’m not sure how it really
works.
The problem is that that is causing
polar ice cap melting, which
obviously gets folks scared and then,
well, then they turn to terrorism
and you know what happens then –
Exactly: we
have mass extinction on our hands.
The honeybee population just can’t
take it anymore, and so
the soil isn’t fertilized the way it ought to be.
Anyway, there’s more, but here’s the thing:
I’m worried my tomatoes won’t do well this year
and I won’t win that blue ribbon at the fair.
Any advice?
No? Well, it’s been great chatting
But if you’ll excuse me now,
I have to go and trim my toenails.
Why? Because it’s Thursday.
I knew you’d understand.
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